1. Your stash of make-up is older than your firstborn.
2. There are Juicy sweats in your go-to clothing pile.
3. Your home decorating theme centers around primary colored plastic.
4. When you start the car and the Disney Princess CD starts playing, you no longer turn it off…even when you’re driving alone.
5. You have five albums full of family photos, and you’re in none of them.
6. You strongly prefer Flavor Blasted Goldfish over the traditional Cheddar Cheese.
7. Poop was the subject of at least one of your conversations in the past week.
8. Your DVR contains 90% animated TV shows; the other 10% is your favorite shows…from last season.
9. Your car console contains at least three of the following: juice box straw, un-used; one dirty tissue; a forgotten permission slip for today’s field trip (oops); an empty baggie containing a trace of unidentifiable gelatinous ooze; a pacifier; a cell phone charger from two phones ago; a Happy Meal toy.
10. Your child can always locate his ‘lovie’…in your bed.